i had more in one way, and much less in more way than one. my creative growth was stunted. my days long and frustrating because they were of someone else’s design. the friendships i had reached a brink, and there was nothing left to learn from them. everyone let me down because i allowed them to.

i moved out of my mother’s house on November 16th, 2010 and today, i couldn’t be more happy with that adjustment. because home truly is where the music is, and home is truly the place you make it. and i personally need music to survive. that phrase as of late seems to sum up my current state of affairs.

it seems i’ve broken hastily away from the 9-to-5 way of life.. simply a wanderer, a traveler. a vagabonding soul with an unquenchable thirst for knowledge and true happiness, healing and creation.

i’ve never had a problem being the shag stoner: i enjoy spending time alone. especially when i have the word in me or the effigy in my mind that reminds me of my grandeur. i set aside the time to glory in my idealism. i am enriched by my sublimity, and therefore i can enrich with my sublimity.

i have my eye on a prize. on a mountaintop. on a land that exists because i’ve put in the work and seeded the hillsides with my whole beating heart. i sit beneath the trees of my own intellect. i bathe in the suns of my own perception. i have no choice but to dispel any individuals who disagree with my methods–this isn’t your land to govern.

i’ve been awarded this exquisite new insight. i smile most often.  i am pleased with this path i find myself on. i have peace and order within my circumstances, and positive chaos and confusion where they too must be.

i no longer look back. i no longer wonder.

i know. and i am the know.

the first, of the many, for the rest of our lives.

“Tattooed Mommy’s; our bodies will be their story book. Tracing the lines while we breast feed.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

10 – 10 / 10.

me life, me musical wife–Mrs. Cheryl Acolatse [Vaughan-Anderson], had her first podcast yesterday, and let me tell you.

you need to hear it.

i can’t quite put into word the feeling, so

light a blunt, hit a bowl. just get it in you.

Joker is a dubstep dude i was introduced to the last time i had to re-up. and woww.

fuck yeah.

yup, there goes music. that beautiful shit we call music. gettin’ all personal. making niggas feel a way.

i wish there was some deeper way i could say “music is life”, but it is exactly that.

BIGHUGE EXASPERATED SIGH.

m u s i c .

the children.. my children. there’s hope.

noooo. words.

(background sounds: Inglourious Basterds/ I Can’t Make You Love Me, Bonnie Raitt.)

today has been one of superbly weird thought.

and this marijuana is dissecting my image. in the most comfortable, and freeing, and incredible way.

i have a note on in my MemoPad named “sayings.“– a note i started taking down while flying with Jane sometime ago. at times such as these, i rip my little fingers to shreds typing on my tiny keyboard.

but really quick because i’m still beside myself about it: why’d Rick Ross have to lie though? if he only he would’ve told the truth. i could’ve propped him up! he’s an extremely convincing dude..

Prince was so incredibly head-on with his line:

“i’m not a woman, i’m not a man, i am something that you’ll never understand.
“;

so many young people have ridiculously irrelevant reasons as to why they connotate negative things with his ways. that line just sums his shit right up for ya. i strive to be more like that line everyday.

Julian Casablanca’s cover of I’ll Try Anything Once has a spectacular line too:

“10 descisions shape your life, you’ll be aware of 5 about..“

but what if some people are only aware of 2 or 3?

such is life though i suppose.

i’d like to be presented with my 10 when  i pass on to my next life.

]]> http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/08/27/first-toke/feed/ 0 thechocolatebar http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/07/28/statements/ http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/07/28/statements/#comments Wed, 28 Jul 2010 18:27:45 +0000 deMei http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/?p=609 ]]> (background sounds: You Don’t Know My Name, Alicia Keys.)

i have this STUPID insatiable urge to cry at the moment. i won’t, but i feel right on the brink.

there’s a guy. i grew up with him, we grew together. i’ve been told i was in love with him. and he’s resurfaced as of late.

but i think a female has taken his spot.

i purchased some video editing software yesterday. i have such visions for some captivating shit.

i don’t appreciate people making assumptions about my person. it’s very fucking irritating.

No Children by The Mountain Goats is an incredibly sick song,

and kind of encompasses how i’m feeling today, i think.

i don’t even really wanna go home next month anymore. i kinda lost all motivation/excitement in the last hour or so.

i’m gonna be in a bad mood the rest of the day. bleck.

SO YEAH. while at work, i accumulate tons and tons of “paper debris”: pieces of parchment on which i scribble things. pockets be fat by the end of a shift let me tell you.

there’s been quite a few instances when i had a compelling thought or message, and i feverishly wrote it down and planned on getting around to putting it up here. but i never got to. until now it seems.

let’s delve into my pockets.

should be “Pachelbel’s” but again, these notes very feverishly i write.

beautiful, beautiful piece of classical music by Johann Pachelbel. i’m sure you’re familiar with.

being the very creative, entrepreneurial spirit that i am, i’m always looking for new ways to be innovative with the launch of my baby, my clothing line, Social Security. it’s taken longer than expected but i press on, and couldn’t be more excited about arriving at the finish line.

stay tuned.

awesome songs. give ‘um a listen.

i write, so it would make sense i bust a few rhymes, no?

“this ain’t cookies, childish games or candy. i’ll keep my mindset, sanity, a mean one,

if i was an M+M i’d have to wife”

…the green one!

i still remember the end of the line, lol.

more S.S. bidnezz.

even more S.S. bizz.

an album by Courtney Love and company that i wanted to check out,

and Sarah Silverman‘s book that i wanna read.

i meant to make a post of this particular scrap. it reads, in its entirety:

“blog about movie man’s stupid crush on me.

he has this nutass crush on me for no reason! he knows nothing about me. don’t even think the homie knows my name, yet we “jumpin’ the broom”. he doesn’t know if i’m a fuckin’ serial killer, but i’m “cute”! he has such base opinions about me. i hate that he has no sense of who i am, but sees such a bright future for us. fuck off my dude.“

yeah. i really just can’t fuck with someone expecting something from me without them even knowing my name. don’t work like that in my world.

actually did get to make a post of this. read up.

have yet to order from them. i enjoy baking too much.

another verse of mine. blue pen though yuuuck. and that handwriting, despicable. i had to have been in a rush.

hope you’ve enjoyed the insight..

opportunities such as don’t present themselves everyday anymore

]]> http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/07/02/scraps/feed/ 0 thechocolatebar scrap. pa. soc. fly. wifeee. soc. soc2. soc3. craze. soc4. cup. ver. http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/06/16/the-musically-inclined-another-survey/ http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/2010/06/16/the-musically-inclined-another-survey/#comments Wed, 16 Jun 2010 19:44:26 +0000 deMei http://thechocolatebar.wordpress.com/?p=580 ]]> i found her. i found my musical equal, my musical other half. my “Music Mrs.“:

Cheryl Franki Selasie Amewusika Kosiwo Acolatse.

and you thought yo dumbass name was cool.

she’s an international model but a prophet among peasants first, and she has an accent that’ll melt your heart.

she has a real way with her words and is very spiritually in tune. she has the craziest dreams and laughs for days. and even while being based halfway ’round the world, she takes the crown as the captain of “#teaminsomniac“.

[@Frankeyz]

get familiar!

1] fill in the blanks: “hello, i’m _____ and i’m a ______ of ______.”

f: “hello, i’m Frankey and i’m a child of the sun.”

2] what genre of music do you feel you are the most knowledgeable about?

f: I would like to say Hip Hop, but it always surprises me.

3] The Gorillaz. Plastic Beach. what did you think?

f: Adored it. I like orchestras.

4] what’s your favorite cover of an original song?

f: Floetry “Waiting in Vain”

5] Imogen Heap‘s Hide And Seek or Blonde Redhead‘s Elephant Woman?

f: Blonde Redhead’s Elephant Woman

6] how much do you miss Amy Winehouse?

f: Like Marie Antoinette misses her head.

7] any favorite classical songs?

f: Nocturne Op. 9 No. 2 by Chopin

8] what are three songs i can find in your “workout” playlist?

f: Banky W “Can’t Stop Me”

Yelawolf “Lick the Cat”

11] your favorite artist to quote?

f: Mos Def.

12] favorite Wale track?

f: Rather Be With You

13] favorite Andre 3000 verse?

f: There is no way in hell I can make that monumental decision. I find it cruel that you would even ask me this question. ALL OF THEM.

14] Theophilus London‘s Day One Fans or Cold Pillow?

f: Cold Pillow.

15] ever had a song that you felt encompassed your life at one point or another?

f: N.E.R.D. “A Wonderful Place”

16] Coldplay‘s Clocks or Keane‘s Somewhere Only We Know?

f: Clocks.

17] Gnarls Barkley‘s Blind Mary or Whose Gonna Save My Soul?

f: Whose Gonna Save My Soul

18] M.I.A‘s World Town or Come Around?

f: Come Around

19] any closing thoughts?

f: I was gonna end it with some deep quote but that’d be so obnoxious of me, so, um, Fuck bitches get money?

everyone’s favorite “football head“, his best friend, and some comrades.

Hey Arnold!

this show had some theme song, huh?

made a bitch wanna hop up and boogie.

Helga’s little Arnold shrine, and her best friend and Arnold’s best friend Gerald hookin’ up lol.

and the Stoop Kid! ahhhhh man.

the first episode, Downtown As Fruits/Eugene’s Bike begins below.